Who can help you write a joke for a speech jobs

1.I would like no less then 90-100 on-page speed insights for desktop and mobile. 2. Book now Contact form submission under 10 seconds. 3. Receive emails once the booking form has been completed. 4. Check & provide a report that all coding has been done correctly on the website. 5. Fix all errors in the attached GT Metrix report Please provide me with exactly how you will achieve these 5 points as generic messages regarding this job will not be awarded. Payment will be broken up into 3 milestones points 1-2, 3-4, 5 Do not apply if you cannot achieve my work standards.

I'm in search of a developer experienced in designing mobile apps on the Wix platform. Project details: - The app should include features such as user registration and login, in-app messaging, and payment gateway integration. - The platform is intended for the general public, so it must be user-friendly and intuitive. - I'm seeking a minimalistic and clean design that is simple yet eye-catching. Skills and Experience: - Expert knowledge in Wix mobile app development - Experience in integrating a payment gateway into a mobile app - Proven track record in creating user-friendly apps - A keen eye for clean, minimalistic design Please note, my budget for this project is $3000. Only those with relevant knowledge and experi...

I'm currently in need of a dedicated Python developer capable of writing a specialized python script. Using Google Cloud Speech-to-Text, the script needs to recognize certain words from ongoing voice communication. Upon recognition of specified words, the code will need to send DTMF commands via a SIM7600 or SIP/VOIP system. In order to accomplish this project's requirements: - Proficiency in Python 3.5 is a must, as the script will need to be written fully in this version of Python. - Familiarity with serial communication is key, as this will be the method through which the script interfaces with the SIM7600 or SIP/VOIP system. - A thorough understanding of Google Cloud Speech-to-Text API is essential given its integral role in...

Hello Sir! As we alreasdy disscussed. I will design beutiful and professional website

I need someone to review my self-help book, providing an honest critique from a reader's perspective. Your review should specifically focus on the book's usefulness: - Evaluate how useful the content is for someone seeking self-help. - Provide constructive feedback on the relevance of the information provided. - Suggest improvements on how the advice can be better implemented. Ideal Skills: - Experience in book reviewing, particularly in the self-help genre. - Excellent analytical skills, able to dissect content and provide valuable insights. - Ability to deliver honest, constructive feedback. Your perspective will help me understand the reader's point of view and improve future editions of the book. BUDGET : MAX 15 EUR. ...

I'm seeking for expert help to solve an issue with locating missing land. Specifically, I require: - Legal advice pertaining to national jurisdiction - Locating the absent land - Establishing a connection with the Prime Minister Office / Chief Minister Office Ideal candidates for this project should provide: - Detailed project proposals including possible solutions or strategies - Evidence of their proficiency in legal issues around land - A proven record of making high-level connections, preferably government related The issue is centered at a national level, so understanding of broad legal jurisdiction will be particularly advantageous.

**We prefer feedback in Spanish, since the rest of the business area is made up of people who speak Spanish (España) hence the writing in Spanish, BUT, if you have great experience or have developed (your team) an application exactly the same or very similar to or similar, please apply.** Descripción del proyecto: Estamos desarrollando un e-commerce de muñecas sexuales que va a ir más allá de todo lo existente en ese campo. La particularidad (y este proyecto) es que: Además estamos desarrollando un sistema de inteligencia artificial para la interactuación los mismos. En esencia virtual y presencial es lo mismo, ya que lal plataforma de chat, más abajo explicada, es la que transfiere vía bluetooth ...

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Hi there, I am currently working on a few projects. As a busy professional, I need someone who is capable of creating simple portfolio pages that showcase my projects. On another freelance site, I am having a hard time getting clients and I want you to work with me together to organize the current project files I have and get images of work done, a portfolio title and a description created for my other freelance profile to showcase all kinds of tasks I have done. I have completed over 61 projects and we need all of them organized and input in my g drive. Start date: Today Time: Now Availability: beginner level freelancer someone who is capable and free to get this done.

Proofreading and editing of 7+ thousand words. I can pay up to $70 - $90 with some bonus for great work. Be available for a short test Please answer the following questions in your bid: => What is your recent academic qualification? => Have you every published your own research article in any Scopus indexed journal? This is a fixed budget project - not an hourly paid gig

Different Website & App Projects Bid ONLY if you have Experience with Coding! ==> Begin your Bid with "OK" Bid for your price in hour!

Hi there, I am currently working on a few projects. As a busy professional, I need someone who is capable of creating simple portfolio pages that showcase my projects. On another freelance site, I am having a hard time getting clients and I want you to work with me together to organize the current project files I have and get images of work done, a portfolio title and a description created for my other freelance profile to showcase all kinds of tasks I have done. I have completed over 61 projects and we need all of them organized and input in my g drive. Payment: 4 AUD Start date: Today Time: Now Availability: beginner level freelancer someone who is capable and free to get this done.

A Dating WEBSITE Not an AP - YOU Must Send a link to an ACTIVE Dating Site You Built OR DO NOT RESPOND More details: Is this project for business or personal use? For starting a new enterprise What information should successful freelancers include in their application? YOU Must Send a link to an ACTIVE Dating Web Site You Built OR DO NOT RESPOND How soon do you need your project completed? Within a month

I'm looking for someone experienced in WordPress maintenance. The main issue I'm facing is related to my Gravity Form not submitting. This issue has appeared without any recent changes to the site, and I need it to be resolved urgently. Key requirements: - Identify the issue with the Gravity Form that is preventing submissions. - Fix the issue without causing any downtime to the website. - Ensure all other aspects of the website are still functioning properly after fixing the form. Ideal skills and experience: - Proficient in WordPress maintenance, specifically with addressing Gravity Form issues. - Strong troubleshooting and problem-solving skills. - Ability to work efficiently and effectively to resolve the issue without causing disruption to the site.

I'm looking for an experienced Android app developer, particularly someone who has worked on a satta matka app before. The app will require a good understanding of the game and its features. Key Requirements: - Prior experience in developing satta matka applications - Proficiency in Android app development Please only apply if you have the necessary experience and skills in this area. Looking forward to collaborating with a skilled professional.

...the natural rhythm of the speech - Reviewing the entire recording and ensuring that the edits do not compromise the speaker's intentions or the coherence of the content Ideal skills and experience: - Proven experience in audio editing, particularly in enhancing the flow and coherence of spoken content - Proficiency in using audio editing software to make precise, subtle changes without compromising the naturalness of the speaker's voice and speech patterns - Strong communication skills to discuss and understand the project's requirements, and if necessary, provide suggestions to enhance the final result Your work will be crucial in transforming this raw material into a polished and professional piece. I look forward to working with a dedicate...

Hi budding freelancers, shall we make a deal? We have a big team in designing and development. Our services:- 1. Creating website - Just viewing page or E commerce 2. Mobile app 3. Logo design 4. Brochure, flyer, business card, calendar 5. Social media post design, video, shorts, reels editing 6. Increasing followers If you know web development, you probably don't know designing and editing. If you know designing, you can't know about web development. So, don't waste clients who don't sync with your talent. Refer us and earn 10-15% of total project budget. Any questions, bid us and we will discuss. Let us grow together and use this freelancer platform wisely.

I am looking for someone to create a floor plan which I will provide. on the layout is offices, rest rooms, three rooms which will have rows of racks. Dimension is critical. The space that will contain all this will be a rectangle. Attached is what I need re-created with some modification, but this is IT.

Fixing sites Back in full all sites Other web related SMALL JOBS

I'm seeking a freelancing expert on deep learning algorithms and network security to develop a methodology tailored for intrusion detection. Your main task will focus on writing a novel deep learning methodology aiming to enhance network intrusion detection accuracy and efficiency. The ideal candidate must have advanced expertise in the following areas: - Deep learning algorithms design and experimentation. - Network traffic data analysis, particularly for IDS - Intrusion detection systems (IDS) and Cybersecurity. - Proven hands-on experience in network traffic data processing. Here is what you will do: - Design a unique deep learning methodology for intrusion detection. - Develop an evaluation/testing protocol. - Run exper...

In one of my projects i want to implement fpx payment gateway. Api's are ready for that and i do have demo account of fpx. We are building the project in react+ionic.

Need to recount the stock quantity based on approve order (Write script to run it) Loop all the orders one time to get latest remaining value. Able to work with ftp. Laravel work. (Not amend source code, or bugs) Start immediately.

I am in need of a C++ web server that fully supports the HTTP/1.0 protocol. This server should be created specifically for Windows XP operating system. I am expecting low levels of traffic, with under 10 users. Key Requirements: - Development of a functional C++ web server - Full support for the HTTP/1.0 protocol - Compatibility with Windows XP - Capacity to handle low traffic levels, up to 100 users per day - Method GET and POST - Method HEAD - Method OPTIONS Ideal Skills and Experience: - Proficient in C++ programming language - Prior experience in creating web servers - In-depth knowledge of HTTP/1.0 protocol - Familiarity with Windows XP operating system - Ability to optimize for low traffic levels Attached is a code example in C++

I'm looking for someone who has experience with the Etsy platform. so I will need to warm up the seller's account and upload the products and description.

...looking for a skilled EGYPTIAN web developer to create an online job portal for a university project. The site should include job listings and a resume upload feature. Key Features: - Job Listings: The website should have a section where job listings can be posted. Users should be able to easily navigate and view the available job opportunities. - Resume Upload: Users should be able to upload and attach their resumes to their profiles. This feature is essential for job seekers to apply for the listed positions. Ideal Skills and Experience: - Proficient in web development: Experience in developing web applications, specifically job portals, is highly preferred. - Frontend and Backend Development: Strong knowledge of both fr...

Need to recount the stock quantity based on approve order (Write script to run it) Able to work with ftp. Laravel work. Start immediately.

More details: What specific issues are you experiencing with the WooCommerce REST API? after changing the hosting from bluehost to AWS some api calls like add to cart do not work, Which specific API calls related to adding to cart are not working after changing the hosting? add_to_cart, update_cart, remove_from_cart How soon do you need your project completed? ASAP

I’m looking to restore the WooCommerce checkout and thank you pages. The initial design and layout of these pages have been altered and I require an expert to revert them back to their original state. The project requires: - Reverting the checkout and thank you pages to their original design and layout - Modifying the color scheme and fonts based on specific color codes and font names that I'll provide - Changing the placement of certain elements Skills and experience required: - Proficiency in WooCommerce and WordPress - Strong design skills with a good eye for detail - Experience in customizing checkout and thank you pages - Ability to work with specific color codes and fonts - Excellent communication and ability to take direction closely ...

More details: What specific functionality would you like to integrate with Paytm UPI on your website? This question was skipped by the user What is the main purpose of integrating Paytm UPI on your website? Accepting payments from customers Do you require any specific Paytm UPI APIs to be integrated apart from the payment processing API? Payment status API

I am in need of a talented ghostwriter who can craft 20 pages of self-help content, tailored particularly for a young adult audience. I have the most of the content just need it do have a bit more personality to it. Can’t be copied from CHATGPT Key Points: - The genre is Self-help, so the ideal candidate should have a good understanding of this genre and how to present information in a clear, engaging, and motivating manner. - It's crucial that the writing style is conversational and engaging. This is to ensure that the book is easy to read and will resonate well with the young adult demographic. - You should be able to deliver 20 pages of high-quality content within a reasonable timeframe. T...

I don't need you to make the characters just find me the best examples. Send me your best samples so I know you are skilled. You must be a professional digital artist so I know you will look for the best AI characters. I'm seeking a skilled professional who can assist me with selecting the 5 best characters in four specific categories. I'm looking for real-looking AI characters in the form of Robots, Aliens, and 6 other categories. Key aspects: - The characters should have been created using AI or digitally developed to look as real as possible. - The selection should be based on the characters' appearance, abilities, and personality, with special emphasis on a realistic portrayal. Ideal S...

I have an STL file for a battery box. It consists of a bottom and a top part, that are connected with a simple hinch. On the other side the box is being closed with a latch, see blue circle in image. The problem is that this latch is breaking off because it is not sturdy enough or the tolerances are just too tight so you have to apply too much force to open the box. Please send an STL and ideally a step file that fixes this problem. This is for 3D printing with FDM printer. For an experienced designer this should be quite easy, I think. Looking forward for your offers. Thanks!

AI Implementation: Business Transformation Keynote Speech

...intermediate knowledge of AI & GenAI to create a captivating 15-20 minute speech. The main focus of your content should be on laying out the steps necessary for a business to successfully adopt and implement AI technologies. Key elements include: - Clear articulation of AI's role in business transformation - AI projects are project regarding people and change management - AI its a matter of culture - AI projects are different from digital innovation projects, AI project must be managed according to Innovation management principles - Comprehensive approacch to AI incorporation in businesses Ideally, you've had previous experience in crafting speeches or articles on similar tech-based themes. Time is of essence as I need this keynote ...

I need to find a job in a school as a teacher or teaching assistant. My Address: Tong Rd, LS12 5HE, England. The school must be a Primary School The school must have a vacancy available online. The job role must be a Teacher or Teaching Assistant. The school must be within 1 hour drive. Please check Primary School websites for job vacancies and add into a spreadsheet with: Primary School name - Area/Town - Job Role - Year Group - Advert Posted Date (if stated) - Start Date Anyone who can help me with this job search may be able to get regular work until I find a job. Must use a spreadsheet. Thanks Must have the name of the specific school (no generalised non-specific listings)

Local area la e commerce grocery mobile app promote pannanum. App install pandravanga, order pandravanga count increase pannanum. Usual marketing like SEO, SMM um venum. Athu illama creative ah innovative ah epdi increase panlam nu strategies um venum. Portfolio strong ah iruntha ithuku munnadi ipdi oru project panni nalla result kaatiruntha bid pannunga.

I'm seeking assistance specifically in algorithm and data structure design in C++ for an academic project. Requirements: - Proficiency in C++: You should have a solid understanding of C++ syntax, language concepts and the ability to write clean, efficient code. - Understanding of basic sorting and searching: Your expertise should cover elementary algorithm design, including basic sorting and searching techniques. - Strong Communication Skills: You should be able to communicate effectively and explain complex ideas in a clear and concise manner. Ideal candidate: - Prior experience in academic projects. - Previous work on algorithm and data structure design. - Familiarity with C++ best practices and standards.

I am in need of a talented ghostwriter who can craft 20 pages of self-help content, tailored particularly for a young adult audience. I have the most of the content just need it do have a bit more personality to it. Can’t be copied from CHATGPT Key Points: - The genre is Self-help, so the ideal candidate should have a good understanding of this genre and how to present information in a clear, engaging, and motivating manner. - It's crucial that the writing style is conversational and engaging. This is to ensure that the book is easy to read and will resonate well with the young adult demographic. - You should be able to deliver 20 pages of high-quality content within a reasonable timeframe. T...

As a service provider in the consulting or healthcare field, I am looking for an experienced digital marketer who can assist in enhancing my online presence through Google Reviews. My primary goal is to attract more customers and increase my business's reach. Key Responsibilities: - Implement strategies to encourage more positive reviews and responses from satisfied customers - Help in the management and response to existing reviews to improve customer perception - Develop a system for tracking and analyzing the impact of the reviews on attracting new customers Ideal Candidate: - Proven experience in digital marketing, particularly in managing online reviews - Understanding of the service industry and the unique challenges and opportu...

Need to recount the stock quantity based on approve order (Write script to run it) Able to work with ftp. Laravel work. Start immediately.

I'm in need of an experienced AI programmer who can develop a French , Spainese, Portugese, Chinese, Indonesia text to speech system. The purpose of this system will be to create an audio book for adults in the genre of inspiration and spiritual. The ideal candidate should have: - Proficiency in French. - Experience with developing AI text to speech systems. - Previous experience with audio book creation would be a plus. Please provide a clear plan on how you'd develop this system and your relevant experience in your bid. Thank you.

I urgently require a model, of any gender and any age, to read a script on camera for an upcoming project. Key Information: - No specific physical appearance characteristics are preferred, the selection would be based entirely on capability and suitability for the role. - Though not mandatory, prior experience in script-reading or acting would be advantageous. - Presence in front of the camera, clarity of speech, and ability to deliver the script convincingly are vital skills needed. 20 video with same model This project offers a great opportunity for those seeking to add more visibility and experience to their portfolio. I look forward to your proposals and collaboration.

I'm in need of a professional who has established connections within the Prime Minister's Office. Your main task will be facilitating a personal request on my behalf: - You will need to make a request for intervention on a personal issue. The details of this issue will be provided privately to the freelancer hired. Ideally, you should have: - Proven experience in liaising with government offices, particularly the Prime Minister's Office. - Strong negotiation and communication skills. - Demonstrated ability to handle sensitive information with discretion. Please note that utmost confidentiality and professionalism are required for this project.

Require urgent. To be submitted on 4th May 2024 Need a presenatation about below topics- - Introduction & Types of Drones - Type of Applications - Benefits of drones - Drone business market globally in 2040 - Drone business market in a country in 2040 - Vertical industry in a country (Construction, Surveying & Mapping, Asset Inspection, Security) - Use cases - Local Drone Players - Existing Companies using Drones - Where we stand?

Analytical essay on operation Anaconda using the the 7 principles of mission command

Seeking App developer for my Candy Game app Project.

Hi Zahiruddin A., I noticed your profile and would like to offer you my project. We can discuss any details over chat.

I'm urgently seeking someone with expertise in Microsoft Word and PowerPoint. As the core tasks involve: - Formatting documents: Revamping and structuring multiple existing ones with professiona...core tasks involve: - Formatting documents: Revamping and structuring multiple existing ones with professional formatting. - Creating templates: Building clean, easy-to-navigate custom Word and PowerPoint templates for future use. - Designing presentations: Enhancing PowerPoint presentations with engaging design. Ideal professionals would be quick responders, experienced in advanced functionalities of Microsoft Office, and possess creative design skills to make presentations visually engaging. As the project needs to be completed ASAP, please apply only if you can com...

We're launching a captivating countdown campaign titled the "FarmEarn SocialFi Airdrop Challenge" for BitSport, a leading web3 gaming platform. We need talented designers to create engaging countdown banners for the final days of this exciting campaign. Campaign Details: Campaign Name: FarmEarn SocialFi Airdrop Challenge Objective: Encourage users to engage with BitSport on Twitter to earn and farm points (BITS) for claiming $BITP tokens. Color Preferences: Vibrant violet/purple gradient color scheme. Banner Requirements: Design two countdown banners: "2 Days Left" Banner "1 Day Left" Banner Each banner should prominently display the remaining days in a visually appealing format. Use vibrant violet/purple gradi...

I urgently require a freelancer to create a logistics management system for my business. The system must address the issues I'm currently facing with tracking shipments and managing inventory. Key Points: - The system should be able to efficiently track shipments and provide real-time updates. This is crucial to improve our customer service and overall business operations. - The inventory management module should be effective and user-friendly. As a business with 18 warehouses, we need to ensure all stock levels are accurately and efficiently maintained across all locations. Skills and Experience: - Proficiency in logistics software development - Strong understanding of inventory management systems - Prior experience with large warehouse networks - Abilit...